Three Ways to Encourage Teens to "Be the Change"

After teaching teens in and out of school for more than a decade, I know that so many of them have the intelligence, energy, drive and dedication to accomplish amazing things.  I also know that it often takes a dedicated adult (or a whole group of them) to ignite those abilities because it really isn't easy being a teen - especially in this globalized 21st century.

The good news is that a little inspiration goes a long way with young people and the return on investment for your time and effort can be infinite.  Encouraging kids definitely falls into the "difficult but worth it" category and I know for certain that there are already so many teachers and parents supporting teens while pointing them in the direction of their dreams.

I have had a lot of experience and success in this realm because real-world projects are my passion and I was able to implement many of them academically and extracurricularly.  My colleagues and I won numerous awards and our students were showcased in multiple newspaper and television interviews for a wide variety of projects.

Even though each project was slightly different, there were three crucial factors that we implemented consistently and these elements apply to home, school, church, or anywhere that teens can have an opportunity to make a difference and "be the change" we all want and need to see in our world.

Listen to and validate their thoughts, concerns, and ideas.  My favorite thing to tell my students has always been, "You have a voice and you can use it to create a positive difference in the world" and I think that it has really enhanced the quality of their work because they want to help and be heard.  So many people of all ages are convinced that their thoughts don't matter and we can blame so many aspects of our culture and society, but things won't shift with blame.  We need to start investing more time and attention in connecting with young people to help cultivate their ideas.  It isn't hard to  meet them on their level and make sure that they know that they matter as individuals and as members of the whole group, but it is getting harder as more and more kids feel that they are being drowned out in the constant noise of everyday interactions both in person and online.  Connection is a basic human need and I would argue that so many of the destructive decisions kids make can be connected back to a lack of connection with themselves, others, and a bigger picture.  Thankfully, staying present and really listening to thoughts and feelings not only makes a difference in encouraging kids to make a difference but also in encouraging them to make good choices.  Best of all, it is free and easy.

Explain that everything is a process and that perfection is not the goal.  Too many people hold themselves back or stop themselves from trying because they are impatient, have high expectations, or give up as soon as they encounter a failure.  The only way we can help teens understand that great things take time and consistent effort and prove to them that they can't compare their beginning to someone else's middle or end is to emphasize the importance of a process.  This is becoming more and more difficult in the digital age because of instant gratification and the culture of comparison, which means it is also becoming more crucial that we teach these lessons and reinforce them frequently.  Most importantly, we need to shift the perception that failure is not an option and make sure that failure is built in as part of the process because failure is how we learn.  Maybe we need to agree to call it something else, but the truth is that failure is one of the greatest teachers and we have to stop treating it like something that needs to be avoided at all costs because that stops too many people from trying new things and from growing.

Provide structure, but allow room for struggle and innovation.  It has become somewhat of a phenomenon in schools that kids want to be told exactly what to do and how to do it and that many of them choose to do the bare minimum.  At first this could seem like laziness and/or apathy but I've come to see it as another side effect of the fear of failure.  Fear of failure and their natural tendency to want to conform and do what everyone else is doing make this the most challenging suggestion, but it is also the most rewarding one.  When teens are given a purposeful task and a few guidelines and boundaries, they can be free to capitalize on their own talents and passions and I'm never disappointed when that happens.  None of us like to struggle and it IS a lot easier to be told what to do and how to do it, but could you imagine how boring this world would be if we all just followed the directions on the assignment sheet without adding our own personal flair?  The youth experience is becoming so standardized and it is up to us as caring, compassionate teachers, parents, coaches and mentors to encourage creativity and innovation by providing meaningful opportunities before its too late.

I know that there is a lot more that I can add to this list, but this is a good start and I would love to hear how YOU encourage the teens in your life, so please leave a comment below!